• Tari

What am I doing here?

I am not a writer. I thought I let you know that before you carry on reading. I am simply putting my thoughts on paper (well in this case on the world wide web, for you to observe, judge, critique, comment, share...) so again I am warning you, I am not a writer.


With the lockdown, I have a lot of time on my hands to sit down and think. Some might say that is good, but trust me, the deep thinker in me says nope, no bueno. I sometimes sit for hours on end just THINKING! So instead of allowing these thoughts to sit in my mind, fester into horrid thoughts, that then turn into terrible dreams (one day we need to start a support group for how lockdown dreams have been a mess!), I have decided I might as well write about it all. Today I want to talk about something that has been on my mind quite a lot lately.


You ever find yourself wondering why you are here? Why am I on this earth? What exactly is the point of me waking up each day, walking, breathing, laughing, talking, working and going back to sleep just to wake up the next day to do it all again. Today I want to talk about purpose.


If you are like me and your purpose is tied to what you did on regular basis pre-lockdown, then I understand if you feel as though life is just passing you by and you are stuck in one place. I have asked God to reveal His will and purpose in my life too many times to count on one hand. I have realised that my purpose is really not the same with every different season that I am in. Personally I have noticed that my purpose seems to, for a lack of a better word, alter or shift according to the season that I am in. This is all from a personal context, so please do not quote me as the oracle of wisdom or knowledge.



So for example, pre-lockdown, my purpose was tied to my service in church on a weekly basis, plus the relationships that I had with my work colleagues on a day to day basis. I found myself going the extra mile to do my part in ministry and exerting myself as much as I could. Then lockdown happened! No more offering to help in church (because church is closed), no more opportunities to spread the love of God to people I work with (I spend 10 hours a day with them, I mean I might as well make the most out of it). It took me a while (3 weeks to be precise) to understand the concept of: LOCKDOWN? NO PROBLEM, WE ALWAYS FIND A WAY.



I spent weeks trying to get the hang of everything, and I am now realising the time that I lost whilst panicking and worrying (instead of doing something) about my part in ministry. I realised that if your purpose is tied to a building, when that building is destroyed, you spend a lot of time running around in circles thinking your purpose is over and there is nothing you can do. But thanks to the OG upstairs, I now understand that purpose and ministry transcend a building, you can take it anywhere. Thanks to our wonderful digital age (I know i will regret saying this one day) I have been spending time exerting the same energy, helping out the same way that I was doing whilst at church doing digital ministry. I now also have a lot of time to build true relationships with people outside of a work environment that allow to still spread the love of God to my work colleagues.


So in closing, my advice for you today is, yes life seems to be passing us by as we are in lockdown, but there is always a way! Find a way to keep your purpose alive through the digital world, make the most of it, build solid relationships and most of all, REST!





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